Sometime last week I seriously considered packing up all my craft stuff and going back to my long lost love of reading. Way cheaper (why don't they have libraries for stamps???) and much less stressful. Yes, the hobby that started out as a major means of dealing with stress had become a source of stress. How could this happen? Competition. I was competing every day. Blog Counters, Stampers Top 50, Comments, Views, Favorites, I was back in high school. Yes, it was 1967 all over again! I love splitcoaststampers but I got swept up in the competition over there. It's the white elephant in the room that I put there and never talked about. How many of my cards are viewed, how many receive comments, are they anyone's favorites? I think the last straw was a list I saw of the galleries that are most viewed. This isn't a criticism of SCS, but of ME. There is no reason for a 54 year old woman to feel less worthy because my strengths don't lie in the papercrafting world (I make a mean brownie cheesecake and am not too shabby of a lawyer....) LOL I would find myself thinking -- oh, that tool looks cool, if I get it, I'll make stuff as nice as she [fill in name of great stamper] does. Why is her [again insert name of great stamper] stuff always fabulous and my stuff a pale imitation? Maybe if I try no layers I'll be better, or maybe if I try lot of embellishments . . . maybe if I spend my life at this I'll be perfect... Oh, if I don't post something on this blog that I've stamped every day (pictures with descriptions please!!) my readership will drop . . . Am I the only one who is neurotic enough to feel this way???? So, I took a major deep breath, thought about this for a while, had an email exchange with a stamper whom I admire (thank you soo much) and decided to change directions. I'm dropping out of the competition I got swept up in. I'll stamp what feels good to me and hope to reconnect to the reasons I started this hobby in the first place. I'll post when I have something I'd like to share. Edited to add: Based on the number of comments, emails and private messages I received, I see you guys are neurotic too!! Yippee. I feel better already knowing there's company in this madness. Between taking my Mom to get a chest x-ray, picking up her prescriptions and getting a few groceries this morning, I managed to squeeze in an hour whipping up a wedding card I need. I'll be honest. The card is ok, but not great. I'm posting it anyway!!! I had fun making it. Wasted tons of paper, but I had fun.